It's all going swimmingly

It was a bit alarming to read that Chris ‘Failing’ Grayling, our much derided (no pun intended) former transport secretary has been put in charge of preparations for a post no-deal Brexit airlift of essential supplies to the UK. His immediate boss and successor as transport secretary, Grant Shapps, who uses several aliases, has expressed confidence that there will be no slip-ups under Grayling’s command. But things are already looking askew. Grayling said “Those who know their history will know that we saved Berlin in the 1960s with a massive airlift which stopped the Communist attempt to starve the city. We can do the same if we prepare now. That is why I am asking the RAF to submit a list of all the DC10s it has which could be made available post-Brexit. I have also requested the Chief of the Air Staff to issue an order to all former RAF pilots still alive to report for duty on the 1st November. Let’s not forget Dunkirk. If it comes to it, anyone with a private pilot’s license and a Cessna 172 will be encouraged to help us overcome the foreign invaders. Message ends. Stand at ease.”