If thy eye offends thee, pluck it out

Here we are on the eve of a new era. It is so profound a revolutionary step, we English should mark it with a new calendar, but until that’s sorted let’s adopt the French Revolutionary model, so today is 11 Pluviôse (apologies if I haven’t got the date quite spot on, we’re in a real democracy now so I can say what I like without Brussels telling me off. So there.) Eventually, we will devise our own Faragian calendar, which will be non-metric and far superior to anything the Europeans have got, as will be our new currency. Tentative, infant steps have already begun on the latter course with the issue of the new 10 shilling coins although due to some Bank of England (ENGERLAND!) incompetence they still have ‘50p’ written on them. Have no fear, Britannia will be back soon and it will once again, triumphally take 144 pennies to make a pound.
 
I was in Whitby today, famous for its being the (near) birthplace of Captain Cook, who did his bit to create the British Empire; of course Whitby now, a la Dracula has its other existence, which I feel certain some people believe is as real as Capt. Cook. Funny how Dracula has benefited the town when all he fictitiously did was come here to suck the blood out of people. But hey, that’s free movement for you. So it was with some amusement to me at least, in these last hours of our membership of that blood-sucking EU that I came across the sign above, which boldly credits the EU with supporting the repair and rebuilding of Whitby’s iconic piers. How such a sign has survived un-vandalised in a constituency that voted strongly for Brexit I don’t know. I suspect that most people are more interested in a symbolic departure from the EU than the real thing. If that’s the case they may be in for a shock. Thank God we have a Prime Minister who has thought it all through.

In the pub tonight I cracked a joke. After Brexit, don't use your mobile in Italy. You'll be stung for Roman charges. Sorry.