+I have been randomly chosen to participate in a major UK health study called ‘Our Future Health.’ This research project aims to recruit five million participants who over many years will provide the NHS and its affiliates with a feast of information about the nation’s health, if not its health service. An extensive questionnaire follows signing up—all the usual questions like how much do you drink, have you ever smoked, family health history, etc., etc. But funnily enough—and I think health practitioners are prone to this—not a word about what is actually in your diet. Carnivore or vegetarian? You’d think they might want to know. From the first tranche of answers and without any further ado they’d be able to tell whether there is a pattern of obesity amongst carnivores (of course there is, there must be, all that horrible grease). Nor does the questionnaire ask about fast foods and sugary products. And yet obesity (and consequently diabetes) is fast overtaking smoking as ‘The big health issue’ which should be remediable. Perhaps the designers of the questionnaire didn’t want to overload participants—as it stands they say it’ll already take 35 minutes to fill in. There is a reward at the end of the day. Fully signed up people will receive a £10 spending voucher, which is enough to buy six crumpets, half a pound of butter, two bottles of beer and some chocolate. And lard if you can stomach it. Not forgetting a bag of crisps.
+The Tory party’s conscription-not-conscription proposal is falling apart before our eyes. James Cleverly, a minister, has said that youngsters won't be criminalised or sent to prison if they don’t submit themselves to this exercise in social adjustment (which will it seems only cost the taxpayer £2.5 billion a year). Given what has been said about how much each conscript will receive (a stipend, not a wage) it sounds like a big attempt to circumvent the Minimum Wage. I was wondering whether the Tory policy makers grew up in and had fond memories of the 1950s, a halcyon period of British life when we still had steam engines running on branch lines, no problems with racism, National Service and a kind hearted retreat from colonialism with a young queen taking up the mantle as leader of a delightfully named Commonwealth. On the other hand, if the patriotic fervour all this conjures up leads to anonymous envelopes flying about—containing white feathers—we could develop a new twist in the development of social media. No, there won’t be physical envelopes, it would be something on Tik Tok, adding yet more pressure on our already pressured teenagers! Are the Tories desperate to lose?
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