Art buff gets in a huff

(23rd to 25th April)
 
I'm in London on my way to Paris and Venice (it's biennale time) and I picked up an enticing looking read - in the form of the City AM magazine, from whose cover the upper part of Keir Starmer's head peered out, in what looked like the equivalent of a 'Kilroy was 'ere' graffiti. I don't know if City AM has an agenda, but in a subtle bid to make Starmer look interesting his feature appeared alongside an article about electricity pylons and being middle aged. No competition! The pylons won. To make the point crystal clear the Starmer profile emphasised how 'boring,' 'a little short of inspiring,' 'cautious, humble, uncontroversial,' 'low voltage' he is. But in his own imagination he is 'ruthless.' Billed as an insight into his 'hopes for Britain' the article revealed very little, but maybe that's because there wasn't much to reveal. We've got the picture.
 
As a septuagenarian I feel entitled to be a grump on occasion, especially since I am, unlike many of my age, a Remoaner. So in case I haven't said this before, I see no reason, especially after Brexit, why hordes of tourists from the EU should have free access to our national art galleries and museums. I know it's always been the case that tourists from abroad have enjoyed this privilege, but why haven't we got a reciprocal arrangement? Since we haven't, it's time we charged. This would have a double benefit - it would realise some much needed revenue for our hard up institutions, and it may reduce the numbers crowding out our cultural palaces. As I write I'm on my way to Paris, where I have already forked out nearly 40 Euros for just two galleries. Perhaps Philistines should recognise culture doesn't come cheap.
 
Oh, and I bet the Louvre will be crowded, so much so that they're introducing limits on the number of visitors. A ticket charge will not suddenly turn, e.g. Tate Modern into a haunted mausoleum. A charge to get into the Louvre has done nothing to diminish the queues. Indeed, they are worse than when I was last here. And I've just read in Euronews that the Louvre’s management are proposing moving the Mona Lisa to a more visitor (i.e. selfie) friendly setting. Estimated cost: 500 million Euros. It'll be down to the Ministry of Culture to give that the go-ahead. By way of comparison Arts Council England's entire annual budget is £485 million. I can imagine the Louvre entrance ticket may have to go up.
 
Thankfully the preponderance of long, steep staircases in the Louvre confines many if not most visitors to the lower floors, so if you fancy a room full of, e.g. Camille Corots to yourself it's up the stairs you can happily go. Perhaps with a bit of training for the Olympics thrown in. Speaking of which, the Pompidou's refurbishment has been delayed until after summer so that weightlifters and shotputters can study some form. So I have made my last visit here for maybe five years - if I live that long. The main exhibition is a retrospective of Constantin Brancusi, which is not greatly to my taste. The Brancusi studio/museum adjacent to the Pompidou used to be one of the few free art places to visit in Paris. Now it has closed, and only paid-up ticket holders can get to see the exhibition. Another sign of the times.

The Pompidou like fellow contemporary art galleries also persists in showing a ‘replica’ of Duchamp’s (sic) ’Fountain’ as if the piece was really his. In fact, only the replicas, of which I believe 17 were produced in the 1950s are in existence—and are presented as the actual thing. As has been demonstrated very forcefully, it is now accepted in informed circles that ’Fountain’ was conceived by Elsa von Freytag-Loringhoven. Why art galleries persist in their deceit is clear. The public generally won’t have heard of dear old Elsa. The truth might also cost them a few bob, nominally. The Pompidou's caption is almost wholly false.

But a new star has emerged on the Parisian art scene, being the conversion of the Bourse into a home for the Pinualt contemporary art museum.  Francois Pinault is not to be outdone by Guggenheim, with several bases in Art Places That Matter. One of the exhibitions there demanded attention—a group of elderly blokes, some in religious garb, sitting in electric wheelchairs moving aimlessly about. Profound and amusing at the same time. Sorry I didn’t make a note of the artist’s name, it will no doubt be on their website.

To be continued . . .  I go to Venice and meet the Pope.

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